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Journal.Kim —A Metasystem Experiment

It gets easier. Every day it gets a little easier. But you gotta do it every day, that’s the hard part. But it does get easier.
—Bojack Horseman

Nine: Setbacks

 | #ninth-week

Week Nine! Okay, it’s actually more like Week Eleven, because it’s been several weeks since my last update. Womp womp.

It’s been a long time since I’ve updated mostly due to usual akrasia. My systems have largely been uneventful, but that’s no excuse.

I think one of my biggest weaknesses is that I can get caught up in caring about what other people think. The longer I keep this up, the more I start to get concerned about expectations, and that fear can cripple me. Luckily, the solution to this is easy, I just have to remember that what other people think isn’t actually relevant.

This is usually obvious to me, but when I begin thinking long-term, I can get caught up in swing of things. The momentum of a project gives it a weight that I’m not used to and don’t know how to control well, if that makes any sense.

And then you let your monkey mind wander, and suddenly it’s May because time slips by so effortlessly if you aren’t being intentional.

Oh, another useful excuse as to why I’ve been absent is demoralization I felt, because I had a lot of work from another technical failure. Weeks worth of coding assignments, and years of writing. Because I had been slacking on using Git, I wasn’t able to recover any of my programming work, but that isn’t a big deal. It’s just something I need to shrug off.

My writing, however, was far more heartbreaking. And I’ve been spending a lot of time creating a web scraper and html parser and thankfully I’ve been able to salvage ~90% of my work since it was once hosted on a website.

Of course, archive everything, and with redundancy. I have a USB I’m putting everything important on now, as well as Dropbox. For one reason or another, I’ve been finding myself hopping from one computer to another, and havne’t really felt like I’ve had the ability to create something larger and long-term. Though, that might be psychological too, though.

Anyways, the only real update I have to my Beeminder is that I’m going to be archiving /daily and /bulletjournal, since they’re both very-often manual input, which seems redundant (in a non-useful way) that I can just use /gratitude for instead.